Aliens are the least of our worries right now but listen to me. Aliens don’t want to hurt us but the government is gonna convince us they do and incite worldwide panic and start a real space war to avoid advancing technology for the general population because efficient non oil based energy that the aliens have will crush the capitalist industries that need it to thrive welcome to my ted talk
this post so confidently and sincerely made it’s point that i had to stop myself checking the news to find out if first contact had happened this morning
you guys cant go around reblogging shit like this while these area 51 raid memes are everywhere
straight people will never understand how therapeutic it is to hear the words “her girlfriend” or “his boyfriend” or how I ascend to heaven when I hear “her wife” and “his husband”
Female customer: “I don’t have a rewards card but my partner might.”
Me, ears perking up: “Great! Can I have their name?”
Customer: “It’s Stephanie ____”
Me: stupidly wide smile and faint twinkle in eyes because holy crap I’m not alone
These two women came up to my register with their twins and they called each other honey and their kids called them both Mom and my soul ascended to the heavens i was so happy
